Monday, April 17, 2006

Laying an Easter Egg

BB's to go: 111.5 or $4.46.

Paint Easter Eggs with the little'uns? Check.
Sing "Here Comes Peter Cottontail?" Check.
Not one, but two Easter Egg Hunts? Check.
Allow a grandparent-instigated sugar pig-out? Check.

Still find time to play about five hundred hands?

Check.


I think I might have pissed the Baby Jesus off by playing not only on Good Friday (kind of unseemly. You know, that whole casting dice for His clothes thing) not only Holy Saturday, but what the hell, Easter Sunday too!

With five of my last ten sessions (four of my last five) being losers, I'm officially declaring this a slump. I've come up with some reasons, other than ethereal, as for why I'm running bad.

1. Variance- I'm not getting as many good hands as before. The playable ones I am getting aren't particularly strong, and I've had to bail out on them. When I'm not coming up second best, that is.

2. Variance- I'm getting killed by the flop. I'm not getting bad beats as much as my suited big slick is running into three-flushes on the flop.

3. Variance- Of course my small pairs won't catch on the flop, of course my draws won't fill. It's a slump, damn it!

4. Bad table choices- I'm sticking with tables that are overly aggressive and I'm not adjusting. I'm playing too many hands out of position and getting stuck having to decide whether or not to make a three bet call on my pocket threes.

************

Hey, you. Yeah, I'm talking to you. I know your junk is still smarting and you can barely walk, but I've got a neat new trick for you.

See that big, mean-looking dog over there? Right, the one that's sleeping in the sun. Take this here stick and poke him right in the ribs. Go on, now!

That's pretty much what I've done. So what if I've got no idea how to play No-Limit. Who cares if I've almost never placed in the money outside of the Stars' .10 donkathons?

Heads-up skillz? Forget that, sucker!

I'm gonna take me some Poker Poison! That's right, I've expressed interest in going mano-a-muchacha with Veneno. Hopefully next week, 'cause I'm getting ready for the home game this week.

And I'll have the time to spend some final quiet moments with the money I'm going to lose to Veneno!

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